The Three Sillies
by Joseph Jacobs · from Collected Folk Tales
Adapted Version
One day, a young man visits a farm. He likes the farmer's girl. She is nice. But she is very, very silly.
The girl goes down to the cellar. She gets the juice for supper. She looks up at the ceiling. She sees a big wooden hammer. It is stuck up there.
"Oh no!" she says. "That hammer can fall! It can bonk someone!" She puts down the jug. She sits down and cries. The juice spills on the floor.
Her mother comes down. "Why do you cry?" she asks. The girl tells her about the hammer. "Oh no! You are right!" says her mother. She sits down and cries too.
Her father comes down. "Why do you both cry?" he asks. They tell him. "Oh no! That is bad!" says her father. He sits down and cries too.
The young man comes down. He sees all three crying. Juice is all over the floor. "Why do you all cry?" he asks. They tell him about the hammer. He laughs and laughs. "That is so silly!" he says.
"You are three big sillies!" he says. "I will go find three more. I will come back. I will marry your girl."
He walks and walks. He sees a woman. She pushes her cow up some steps. "The cow must eat!" she says. "The grass is on the roof!" "That is silly!" he says. "Cut the grass. Bring it down!"
He walks on. He meets a man. The man jumps and jumps. He tries to hop into his pants. "I jump and jump!" the man says. "The pants do not go on!"
The young man laughs. "Sit down," he says. "Put one leg in. Then the other." The man tries it. It works! "That is silly!" says the young man.
He walks on. He sees people by a pond. They have rakes and nets. They try to catch the moon. It is in the water.
"That is not the real moon!" he says. "Look up! It is in the sky!" They do not listen. They just shake their heads. They keep trying.
The young man laughs. "I found three sillier people!" he says. He goes back home.
He marries the farmer's girl. And they are all very happy. But still a little bit silly.
Original Story
THE THREE SILLIES
Once upon a time there was a farmer and his wife who had one daughter, and
she was courted by a gentleman. Every evening he used to come and see her,
and stop to supper at the farmhouse, and the daughter used to be sent down
into the cellar to draw the beer for supper. So one evening she had gone
down to draw the beer, and she happened to look up at the ceiling while
she was drawing, and she saw a mallet stuck in one of the beams. It must
have been there a long, long time, but somehow or other she had never
noticed it before, and she began a-thinking. And she thought it was very
dangerous to have that mallet there, for she said to herself: “Suppose him
and me was to be married, and we was to have a son, and he was to grow up
to be a man, and come down into the cellar to draw the beer, like as I'm
doing now, and the mallet was to fall on his head and kill him, what a
dreadful thing it would be!” And she put down the candle and the jug, and
sat herself down and began a-crying.
Well, they began to wonder upstairs how it was that she was so long
drawing the beer, and her mother went down to see after her, and she found
her sitting on the settle crying, and the beer running over the floor.
“Why, whatever is the matter?” said her mother. “Oh, mother!” says she,
“look at that horrid mallet! Suppose we was to be married, and was to have
a son, and he was to grow up, and was to come down to the cellar to draw
the beer, and the mallet was to fall on his head and kill him, what a
dreadful thing it would be!” “Dear, dear! what a dreadful thing it would
be!” said the mother, and she sat her down aside of the daughter and
started a-crying too. Then after a bit the father began to wonder that
they didn't come back, and he went down into the cellar to look after them
himself, and there they two sat a-crying, and the beer running all over
the floor. “Whatever is the matter?” says he. “Why,” says the mother,
“look at that horrid mallet. Just suppose, if our daughter and her
sweetheart was to be married, and was to have a son, and he was to grow
up, and was to come down into the cellar to draw the beer, and the mallet
was to fall on his head and kill him, what a dreadful thing it would be!”
“Dear, dear, dear! so it would!” said the father, and he sat himself down
aside of the other two, and started a-crying.
Now the gentleman got tired of stopping up in the kitchen by himself, and
at last he went down into the cellar too, to see what they were after; and
there they three sat a-crying side by side, and the beer running all over
the floor. And he ran straight and turned the tap. Then he said: “Whatever
are you three doing, sitting there crying, and letting the beer run all
over the floor?”
“Oh!” says the father, “look at that horrid mallet! Suppose you and our
daughter was to be married, and was to have a son, and he was to grow up,
and was to come down into the cellar to draw the beer, and the mallet was
to fall on his head and kill him!” And then they all started a-crying
worse than before. But the gentleman burst out a-laughing, and reached up
and pulled out the mallet, and then he said: “I've travelled many miles,
and I never met three such big sillies as you three before; and now I
shall start out on my travels again, and when I can find three bigger
sillies than you three, then I'll come back and marry your daughter.” So
he wished them good-bye, and started off on his travels, and left them all
crying because the girl had lost her sweetheart.
Well, he set out, and he travelled a long way, and at last he came to a
woman's cottage that had some grass growing on the roof. And the woman was
trying to get her cow to go up a ladder to the grass, and the poor thing
durst not go. So the gentleman asked the woman what she was doing. “Why,
lookye,” she said, “look at all that beautiful grass. I'm going to get the
cow on to the roof to eat it. She'll be quite safe, for I shall tie a
string round her neck, and pass it down the chimney, and tie it to my
wrist as I go about the house, so she can't fall off without my knowing
it.” “Oh, you poor silly!” said the gentleman, “you should cut the grass
and throw it down to the cow!” But the woman thought it was easier to get
the cow up the ladder than to get the grass down, so she pushed her and
coaxed her and got her up, and tied a string round her neck, and passed it
down the chimney, and fastened it to her own wrist. And the gentleman went
on his way, but he hadn't gone far when the cow tumbled off the roof, and
hung by the string tied round her neck, and it strangled her. And the
weight of the cow tied to her wrist pulled the woman up the chimney, and
she stuck fast half-way and was smothered in the soot.
Well, that was one big silly.
And the gentleman went on and on, and he went to an inn to stop the night,
and they were so full at the inn that they had to put him in a
double-bedded room, and another traveller was to sleep in the other bed.
The other man was a very pleasant fellow, and they got very friendly
together; but in the morning, when they were both getting up, the
gentleman was surprised to see the other hang his trousers on the knobs of
the chest of drawers and run across the room and try to jump into them,
and he tried over and over again, and couldn't manage it; and the
gentleman wondered whatever he was doing it for. At last he stopped and
wiped his face with his handkerchief. “Oh dear,” he says, “I do think
trousers are the most awkwardest kind of clothes that ever were. I can't
think who could have invented such things. It takes me the best part of an
hour to get into mine every morning, and I get so hot! How do you manage
yours?” So the gentleman burst out a-laughing, and showed him how to put
them on; and he was very much obliged to him, and said he never should
have thought of doing it that way.
So that was another big silly.
Then the gentleman went on his travels again; and he came to a village,
and outside the village there was a pond, and round the pond was a crowd
of people. And they had got rakes, and brooms, and pitchforks, reaching
into the pond; and the gentleman asked what was the matter. “Why,” they
say, “matter enough! Moon's tumbled into the pond, and we can't rake her
out anyhow!” So the gentleman burst out a-laughing, and told them to look
up into the sky, and that it was only the shadow in the water. But they
wouldn't listen to him, and abused him shamefully, and he got away as
quick as he could.
So there was a whole lot of sillies bigger than them three sillies at
home. So the gentleman turned back home again and married the farmer's
daughter, and if they didn't live happy for ever after, that's nothing to
do with you or me.
Story DNA
Moral
Common sense is a valuable trait, and sometimes, what seems obvious to one person is completely baffling to another.
Plot Summary
A gentleman is courting a farmer's daughter, but when she, her mother, and her father all cry hysterically over the imagined future death of a non-existent son from a falling mallet, the gentleman declares them three big sillies. He vows to travel and only marry the daughter if he finds three people sillier than them. On his journey, he encounters a woman who accidentally kills herself and her cow trying to get the animal to eat grass on a roof, a man who struggles for an hour to put on his trousers, and a village full of people trying to rake the moon's reflection out of a pond. Having found many more sillies, he returns and marries the farmer's daughter.
Themes
Emotional Arc
frustration to amusement to satisfaction
Writing Style
Narrative Elements
Cultural Context
Joseph Jacobs was a prominent collector and re-teller of English fairy tales, often simplifying and standardizing them for a wider audience. This tale belongs to a common folk motif of 'numskulls' or 'wise fools' found across many cultures.
Plot Beats (14)
- A farmer's daughter goes to the cellar to draw beer and sees a mallet stuck in a beam.
- She imagines a future son being killed by the mallet and starts crying, letting the beer overflow.
- Her mother finds her, hears the absurd reason, and joins her in crying.
- Her father finds both of them, hears the reason, and joins them in crying.
- The gentleman comes down, finds them all crying over the mallet, and laughs.
- He declares them three big sillies and vows to travel until he finds three bigger sillies before marrying the daughter.
- The gentleman encounters a woman trying to lead her cow up a ladder to eat grass on the roof, tying the cow's neck to her wrist via the chimney.
- The cow falls, strangles itself, and pulls the woman up the chimney, smothering her.
- The gentleman meets a man who struggles for an hour each morning trying to jump into his trousers.
- The gentleman shows the man how to put on trousers, marking him as another silly.
- The gentleman finds a crowd of villagers trying to rake the moon's reflection out of a pond.
- He tells them it's a reflection, but they refuse to listen and abuse him.
- Realizing he has found many sillier people, the gentleman returns home.
- He marries the farmer's daughter.
Characters
The Gentleman ★ protagonist
None explicitly mentioned, but implied to be able-bodied and observant.
Attire: Period-appropriate gentleman's attire for traveling (e.g., coat, breeches, boots).
Observant, intelligent, amused, pragmatic.
Image Prompt & Upload
A distinguished gentleman protagonist from a fairy tale. A tall, slender man in his early 30s with sharp, noble features, high cheekbones, and a strong jawline. He has neatly combed dark brown hair swept back and warm hazel eyes with a determined yet kind expression. He wears a tailored deep navy frock coat with brass buttons over a crisp white linen shirt with a high collar, dark burgundy waistcoat, fitted charcoal trousers, and polished black leather boots. He stands with confident, upright posture, one hand resting on a ornate silver-handled walking cane, the other holding a sealed letter. He has a faint smile suggesting quiet bravery. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature
The Daughter ◆ supporting
None explicitly mentioned.
Attire: Simple, practical peasant dress, likely made of homespun fabric.
Overly imaginative, prone to exaggerated worry, easily distressed.
Image Prompt & Upload
A young woman in her late teens with a kind, gentle expression. She has long, wavy chestnut hair partially tied back with a simple ribbon. She wears a modest, long-sleeved dress of faded blue linen with a white apron, the hem slightly dusty. Her posture is poised but relaxed, one hand lightly resting on a woven basket at her side as she looks directly forward with soft, hopeful eyes. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Mother ◆ supporting
None explicitly mentioned.
Attire: Simple, practical peasant dress, apron.
Easily influenced, prone to exaggerated worry, sympathetic.
Image Prompt & Upload
A middle-aged woman with kind eyes and a gentle, reassuring smile. She has soft brown hair loosely tied back. She is wearing a simple, comfortable cream-colored knit sweater and a long, flowing skirt in muted earth tones. Her posture is warm and inviting, one hand slightly extended as if offering support or comfort. She stands with a calm, steady presence. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Father ◆ supporting
None explicitly mentioned.
Attire: Simple, practical farmer's attire (e.g., smock, breeches, sturdy shoes).
Easily influenced, prone to exaggerated worry, concerned.
Image Prompt & Upload
A middle-aged man with a kind, weathered face, gentle brown eyes, and a warm, reassuring smile. He has short, slightly graying brown hair and a neatly trimmed beard. He is wearing a comfortable, earth-toned woolen shirt with rolled-up sleeves, sturdy brown trousers, and worn leather boots. His posture is relaxed and open, standing with one hand slightly extended as if offering help or guidance. He has a sturdy, capable build. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Woman with the Cow ○ minor
None explicitly mentioned.
Attire: Simple, practical peasant dress, possibly a head covering.
Silly, impractical, stubborn.
Image Prompt & Upload
A middle-aged woman with gentle eyes and a kind, weathered face, her brown hair tied back in a practical braid. She wears a simple, faded blue linen dress with a white apron, sturdy brown boots, and a straw hat. She stands beside a large, calm black-and-white dairy cow, one hand resting on its back. She holds a wooden milk pail in her other hand. She has a serene, patient expression. They are in a sun-dappled meadow with a few wildflowers. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Other Traveller ○ minor
None explicitly mentioned.
Attire: Period-appropriate men's nightclothes (e.g., nightshirt) and then struggling with breeches.
Friendly, pleasant, incredibly silly, easily frustrated by simple tasks.
Image Prompt & Upload
A young adult traveller with a weathered leather satchel slung across their chest, wearing a deep green hooded cloak over a simple tunic and trousers. They have short, wind-tousled brown hair, a curious and slightly wary expression, and sturdy walking boots. Their posture is alert yet relaxed, one hand resting on the strap of their satchel as they glance to the side. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
Locations
Farmer's Cellar
A dark, underground room in a farmhouse where beer is stored and drawn. The ceiling has beams, and a mallet is stuck in one of them. Beer is running over the floor.
Mood: Initially mundane, then shifts to dramatic and absurd with the crying, finally humorous.
The daughter's initial silly fear, the family's collective crying, and the gentleman's discovery of their silliness.
Image Prompt & Upload
A dimly lit, subterranean farmhouse cellar with rough-hewn stone walls and a low, heavy beamed ceiling. A worn wooden mallet is firmly wedged into a central beam. A slow, steady stream of dark amber beer flows from a large wooden barrel, pooling and glistening across the uneven dirt floor. The air is cool and damp, with a single hanging oil lantern casting long, dramatic shadows and a warm, golden glow that catches the sticky sheen of the spilled beer. The scene is rich with textures of old wood, wet stone, and earthen tones. no border, no frame, no watermark, no text, no signature, edge-to-edge illustration.
Woman's Cottage with Grass Roof
A cottage with grass growing on its roof. A ladder is propped against the cottage.
Mood: Quirky, then tragic and darkly humorous.
The gentleman encounters the first 'bigger silly' trying to get her cow onto the roof.
Image Prompt & Upload
Soft morning light filters through a misty forest clearing, illuminating a charming stone cottage with a thick, overgrown grass roof that blends seamlessly into the surrounding meadow. A rustic wooden ladder leans against the weathered timber facade, its rungs slightly mossy. The thatched roof sprouts wildflowers and tall grasses swaying gently in a cool breeze. A cobblestone path winds through lush clover and daisies toward a round wooden door with iron hinges. Towering pine trees frame the scene, their shadows dancing on the moss-covered ground. The air feels damp and fresh, with dewdrops glistening on fern fronds and spiderwebs stretched between wildflower stems. A soft palette of moss green, stone grey, and earthy browns dominates, accented by pops of purple heather and yellow buttercups. no border, no frame, no watermark, no text, no signature, edge-to-edge illustration
Inn Room
A double-bedded room in an inn, containing a chest of drawers.
Mood: Initially friendly, then humorous and bewildered.
The gentleman encounters the second 'bigger silly' struggling to put on his trousers.
Image Prompt & Upload
A cozy, rustic inn room at night, illuminated by the warm golden glow of a crackling stone fireplace and flickering beeswax candles on a heavy oak chest of drawers. The room features a large wooden double bed with a thick, hand-stitched quilt in deep burgundy and forest green. Rough-hewn timber beams cross the low ceiling. A single arched window reveals a moonlit forest outside, its silver light contrasting with the amber interior. A worn wool rug covers the plank floor, and shadows dance in the corners. The atmosphere is peaceful and inviting, with a palette of rich browns, warm golds, and deep shadows. Painterly style, detailed textures, soft lighting. no border, no frame, no watermark, no text, no signature, edge-to-edge illustration.
Village Pond
A pond located outside a village, surrounded by a crowd of people.
Mood: Confused, then highly absurd and confrontational.
The gentleman encounters a whole group of 'sillies' trying to rake the moon out of the pond.
Image Prompt & Upload
Early morning mist hangs over a tranquil village pond, its glassy surface reflecting the soft pink and gold hues of dawn. Gentle ripples disturb the water near a small wooden dock where a few simple rowboats are moored. The pond is fringed with tall reeds and clusters of yellow flag irises, their stems disappearing into the murky water. A worn dirt path circles the pond, leading towards the thatched roofs and timber-framed houses of a quaint village just visible through the morning haze. A large, ancient willow tree drapes its sweeping branches over one bank, its leaves whispering against the water. The air is cool and still, with a sense of quiet anticipation before the day begins. The scene is painted in soft, muted tones of sage green, watery blue, and weathered wood brown. no border, no frame, no watermark, no text, no signature, edge-to-edge illustration.
