CXXXVIII NUIT
by Unknown · from Les mille et une nuits - Tome premier
Adapted Version
Ahmed lived in a big city. He had a special day. He needed a shave! Ahmed had a sore leg. He needed to look good. He wanted to look his best. He had a special meeting. He called for a barber. He waited for the barber to come.
Mr. Talky the barber came. He did not shave. He did not get his shaving tools ready. He took out his bag. He took out many things. He took out a shiny tool. It looked like a star map. Mr. Talky looked at it. He looked at it very closely. He looked at it for a long time. He did not prepare his razors.
Mr. Talky went outside. He walked slowly. He looked at the sun. He held his shiny tool up. He held the tool to the sky. He came back inside. He came back inside the house. Mr. Talky looked at Ahmed. He shook his head. "Today is the eighteenth day," he said. "The stars are not good. The stars show a big problem. A very big problem. A long, long problem for you. A danger is near."
Ahmed was not happy. He was very angry. He hit his hand on the chair. "No!" he said. "I need a shave! Now! Stop talking! Stop looking at stars! Shave me or go away! I have a special meeting!"
Mr. Talky did not listen. He smiled a big smile. "Oh, my dear friend," he said. "I am the best barber. The very best. I am a doctor. I am a teacher. I am a clever man. I am a builder of houses. I know all things. I know all about life."
"Your father knew me," Mr. Talky said. "He knew me well. He liked me very much. He said I was a good man."
"So I will help you," Mr. Talky said. "I will protect you. I will keep you safe. For your father, I will help you. He was my good friend."
Ahmed was still angry. But Mr. Talky talked and talked. He talked and talked and talked. He did not stop. Ahmed tried not to smile. He tried to stay angry. But it was too much. He started to laugh. He laughed and laughed. He could not stop laughing.
"Please," Ahmed said. He wiped his eyes. He stopped laughing. "Please, just shave me now. I need my shave. My meeting is soon."
The story person stopped her tale. "Did Ahmed get his shave?" she asked. "Did Mr. Talky ever stop talking? We will know the next day!"
Original Story
CXXXVIII NUIT.
«Le barbier, dit le jeune boiteux de Bagdad, employa beaucoup de temps à déplier sa trousse et à préparer ses rasoirs: au lieu de mettre de l'eau dans son bassin, il tira de sa trousse un astrolabe fort propre, sortit de ma chambre, et alla au milieu de la cour d'un pas grave prendre la hauteur du soleil. Il revint avec la même gravité, et en rentrant: «Vous serez bien aise, seigneur, me dit-il, d'apprendre que nous sommes aujourd'hui au vendredi dix-huitième de la lune de Safar, de l'an 653, depuis la retraite de notre grand prophète de la Mecque à Médine, et de l'an 7320, de l'époque du grand Iskender aux deux cornes; et que la conjonction de Mars et de Mercure signifie que vous ne pouvez pas choisir un meilleur temps qu'aujourd'hui à l'heure qu'il est pour vous faire raser. Mais, d'un autre côté, cette même conjonction est d'un mauvais présage pour vous. Elle m'apprend que vous courez en ce jour un grand danger; non pas véritablement de perdre la vie, mais d'une incommodité qui vous durera le reste de vos jours; vous devez m'être obligé de l'avis que je vous donne de prendre garde à ce malheur; je serais fâché qu'il vous arrivât.»
«Jugez, mes seigneurs, du dépit que j'eus d'être tombé entre les mains d'un barbier si babillard et si extravagant: quel fâcheux contretemps pour un amant qui se préparait à un rendez-vous! j'en fus choqué. «Je me mets peu en peine, lui dis-je en colère, de vos avis et de vos prédictions: je ne vous ai point appelé pour vous consulter sur l'astrologie; vous êtes venu ici pour me raser: ainsi, rasez-moi ou vous retirez, que je fasse venir un autre barbier.»
«Seigneur, me répondit-il avec un flegme à me faire perdre patience, quel sujet avez-vous de vous mettre en colère? Savez- vous bien que tous les barbiers ne me ressemblent pas, et que vous n'en trouveriez pas un pareil quand vous le feriez faire exprès? Vous n'avez demandé qu'un barbier, et vous avez en ma personne le meilleur barbier de Bagdad, un médecin expérimenté, un chimiste très-profond, un astrologue qui ne se trompe point, un grammairien achevé, un parfait rhétoricien, un logicien subtil, un mathématicien accompli dans la géométrie, dans l'arithmétique, dans l'astronomie et dans tous les raffinements de l'algèbre, un historien qui sait l'histoire de tous les royaumes de l'univers. Outre cela, je possède toutes les parties de la philosophie. J'ai dans ma mémoire toutes nos lois et toutes nos traditions. Je suis poète, architecte; mais que ne suis-je pas? Il n'y a rien de caché pour moi dans la nature. Feu monsieur votre père, à qui je rends un tribut de mes larmes toutes les fois que je pense à lui, était bien persuadé de mon mérite: il me chérissait, me caressait, et ne cessait de me citer dans toutes les compagnies où il se trouvait, comme le premier homme du monde: je veux, par reconnaissance et par amitié pour lui, m'attacher à vous, vous prendre sous ma protection, et vous garantir de tous les malheurs dont les astres pourront vous menacer.»
«À ce discours, malgré ma colère, je ne pus m'empêcher de rire. «Aurez-vous donc bientôt achevé, babillard importun? m'écriai-je, et voulez-vous commencer à me raser?»
En cet endroit Scheherazade cessa de poursuivre l'histoire du boiteux de Bagdad, parce qu'elle aperçut le jour; mais la nuit suivante elle en reprit ainsi la suite:
Story DNA
Plot Summary
A young lame man in Baghdad, in a hurry for a romantic meeting, calls a barber. Instead of shaving him, the barber performs an elaborate astrological reading, predicting a lifelong inconvenience. Despite the young man's growing anger and demands to be shaved, the barber launches into a lengthy, self-aggrandizing monologue, listing his countless talents and wisdom, even invoking the young man's deceased father. The young man, exasperated but ultimately amused by the barber's endless chatter, finally laughs and again asks him to begin the shave, at which point Scheherazade interrupts the story.
Themes
Emotional Arc
frustration to exasperation
Writing Style
Narrative Elements
Cultural Context
The story is a fragment from 'One Thousand and One Nights' (Arabian Nights), a collection of Middle Eastern folk tales compiled during the Islamic Golden Age. The specific date references ground it in a historical Islamic context, though the story itself is fantastical.
Plot Beats (11)
- A young lame man in Baghdad needs a shave before a rendezvous.
- The barber arrives but takes an unusual amount of time to prepare, pulling out an astrolabe.
- The barber goes into the courtyard to take a sun reading, then returns to announce the date and an astrological prediction.
- The barber warns the young man of a great danger, not of death, but of a lifelong inconvenience.
- The young man, annoyed and in a hurry, expresses his anger and tells the barber to shave him or leave.
- The barber, calmly, begins to list his many accomplishments and skills, claiming to be the best barber, a doctor, chemist, astrologer, grammarian, rhetorician, logician, mathematician, historian, philosopher, poet, and architect.
- The barber mentions the young man's deceased father, claiming he recognized his merit and cherished him.
- The barber declares his intention to protect the young man out of respect and friendship for his father.
- The young man, despite his anger, finds himself laughing at the barber's incessant chatter.
- The young man again asks the barber to finally begin shaving him.
- Scheherazade stops the story as day breaks, promising to continue it the next night.
Characters
Le jeune boiteux de Bagdad
A young man, likely of average height and build, distinguished by a noticeable limp or 'boiteux' (lame/crippled) gait. His physical discomfort or disability is a key characteristic, though its exact nature is not detailed. Given the setting of Bagdad, he would have a complexion typical of the Middle East, with dark hair and eyes.
Attire: As a young man of some means in Bagdad, he would wear a thobe or similar loose-fitting tunic, possibly made of fine linen or cotton, perhaps with a vest (sadriya) over it. Colors would be rich but not overly ostentatious, perhaps deep blues, greens, or earth tones. He might wear a simple head covering like a kufi or a small turban, or have his hair uncovered if indoors.
Wants: To be clean-shaven and prepared for his romantic rendezvous. He desires efficiency and directness.
Flaw: Short temper and impatience, which makes him vulnerable to the barber's lengthy monologues.
In this excerpt, he remains frustrated and impatient, not yet having achieved his goal. His arc is one of enduring the barber's antics.
Impatient, easily angered, practical, focused on his immediate goals (the rendezvous). He is not easily swayed by flattery or verbose explanations.
Le Barbier
An adult man, likely of average build, with a serious and deliberate demeanor. His movements are described as 'grave' (solemn). Given the setting of Bagdad, he would have a complexion typical of the Middle East, with dark hair and eyes.
Attire: He would wear practical but respectable clothing for his profession, likely a clean, light-colored thobe or tunic made of cotton or linen, perhaps with a simple sash. He might wear a small, neat turban or a kufi cap. His attire would be clean and well-maintained, reflecting his meticulous nature.
Wants: To showcase his vast knowledge and perceived importance, to offer unsolicited advice, and to perform his job (eventually) with meticulous detail.
Flaw: Excessive verbosity and self-aggrandizement, which alienates his clients and delays his work.
In this excerpt, he remains steadfast in his verbose and self-important nature, completely unaffected by the young man's frustration.
Extremely verbose, self-important, pedantic, calm, unperturbed by others' anger, highly knowledgeable (or claims to be), superstitious (believes in astrology).
Scheherazade
A young woman of exceptional beauty and intelligence, likely of Middle Eastern or Persian descent. Her physical description is not provided in this excerpt, but she is the storyteller of the frame narrative.
Attire: She would wear luxurious and elegant garments befitting a queen or a woman of high status in a Persian court, such as a richly embroidered silk kaftan or a flowing dress, perhaps with intricate patterns and jewels, reflecting the opulence of the setting.
Wants: To survive by entertaining the Sultan with her stories, and ultimately to reform him.
Flaw: Her life is constantly at risk, dependent on her storytelling ability.
Her arc is ongoing, as she continues to tell stories to survive. In this excerpt, she pauses her story as dawn breaks.
Intelligent, resourceful, captivating, patient, strategic. Her primary trait is her ability to weave compelling narratives to save her life.
Locations
The Young Man's Chamber
A private room within a traditional Baghdadi house, likely adorned with carpets and cushions, where the young man awaits his shave. The light would be filtered through mashrabiya screens or small windows.
Mood: Initially expectant and private, quickly becoming exasperated and confined due to the barber's loquaciousness.
The young man's initial encounter with the verbose barber and the beginning of the barber's astrological pronouncements.
Courtyard of the Baghdadi House
A central open-air courtyard, typical of Islamic architecture, providing light and air to the surrounding rooms. It would likely feature a fountain or a small garden, paved with stone or tiles.
Mood: Open, bright, and calm, contrasting with the tension building inside the chamber.
The barber's ritualistic departure to the courtyard to take the sun's height with his astrolabe, emphasizing his eccentric nature.