FOURTEEN
by Rose Fyleman · from The Rainbow Cat
Adapted Version
A wizard lived in a busy town. He had a special umbrella. But he was a little bit silly! He leaves the umbrella. It is at a market stall.
The next day, a woman comes. She is The Farmer's Wife. She sees the umbrella. "This is a good umbrella!" she thinks. No one asks for it. She takes it home.
This umbrella is magic. It has special powers. Hold it open. Count to three. You go to your house. Count to five. You go where you wish. The Farmer's Wife does not know.
One day, rain falls. It is market day. The Farmer's Wife is wet. She opens the umbrella. It keeps her dry.
She sells eggs. She holds the umbrella. She counts "One, two, three." Poof! She is in her kitchen. She is very surprised. She does not know why.
The Farmer's Wife is confused. Her husband comes home. He asks, 'Why here?' She says, 'Headache.' He doubts.
Later, it is a hot day. The Farmer's Wife visits. She sees The Daughter. She takes the umbrella. It gives her shade.
She sits with The Daughter. Cars drive by. She holds the umbrella. She counts to five. She wishes for car.
Suddenly, she is in a car! An Old Lady is there. An Old Gentleman is there. A Dog is there. The Dog barks. Woof! Woof! They are all angry.
The Old Gentleman is very mad. He shouts, "Hey! Get out!" The Farmer's Wife is shocked. She cannot speak.
The Daughter runs to her. She is very surprised. "Mother, what happened?" she asks. The Farmer's Wife feels sick. She will see the Doctor.
She goes to The Doctor. He checks her pulse. He says, 'Funny feeling.' 'Take medicine.' 'Keep your nose warm!' he adds.
The Farmer's Wife thinks. She thinks about her nose. She forgets the umbrella. The next day, it is gone.
So, if you find an umbrella. Be careful, dear reader. Do not count with it open. It might be magic!
Original Story
FOURTEEN
The Magic Umbrella
THERE was once a wizard who possessed a magic umbrella; and, being rather careless in his habits, he had the misfortune to leave it behind him in a small country town where he had had an appointment to meet a friend in the market-place at midnight. He left it standing against one of the wooden market stalls, and there it was found next morning by a farmer’s wife who had come into town to sell her butter and eggs.
“That’s a good, strong-looking umbrella,” she said to herself; “if no one comes to claim it I shall keep it.” No one made any inquiries, so she took possession of it, and when she went home in the evening, the umbrella went with her.
Now, as I said before, this was no ordinary umbrella, but was possessed of magic powers.
If you held it open in your hand and counted three and then stopped, you found yourself in your own house.
If you counted five, however, you found yourself where you most desired to be.
But if you counted up to seven, you were immediately carried away to the top of the nearest church spire.
Now of all this the farmer’s wife was quite unaware, and you shall hear what befell her in consequence.
It chanced to be very wet on the next market day, and when presently the rain began to drip upon her bonnet through the canvas roof of the stall, she was very glad to be able to put up the umbrella and shelter beneath it.
It was about three o’clock in the afternoon and she had sold most of her eggs and butter.
A little boy came along and asked for three fresh eggs.
“There you are, my love,” she said. “The last three.”
She held the umbrella in one hand and with the other put the eggs into the boy’s basket.
“One, two, three,” she said. And instantly she found herself standing in the middle of her own pleasant kitchen, with her basket on her arm and the open umbrella still firmly held in her hand.
You can imagine how surprised and puzzled she was. She hadn’t the faintest idea how she had got there, but she decided to say nothing about it to any one.
When presently her husband came in for his tea he asked why she had come home so early.
“I had a bit of a headache,” she said. “I think the sun was too strong for me.”
The farmer gave a great guffaw. “Come, come, mother,” he said, “you must have been dreaming. There’s been no sun to-day, neither in town nor country.”
“Well, maybe it was the damp that got into my head,” said his wife. “I think I’ll go to bed and have a basin of hot gruel.” So she went to bed and had the hot gruel, and by the next morning she had almost forgotten all about her queer adventure.
Nothing more happened for some time. The weather was warm and sunny, and the umbrella stood unused in the corner of the kitchen.
But one day the farmer’s wife decided to go and see her daughter, who was married and lived in a village a few miles away. It was a very hot day and she thought it would be a good plan to take the umbrella with her to shade her from the sun.
After dinner she and her daughter went for a walk upon a neighbouring common, and when they had gone a little way they sat down for a rest on a warm dry bit of grass by the side of the road that ran across the heath, for they were hot and rather tired.
“What a lot of motor-cars there are on this road, to be sure,” said the farmer’s wife, who held the open umbrella over her head. “One, two, three, four, five.... I wish I was in one of them.” No sooner had she uttered these words than she found herself plumped right into the middle of the nearest car, in which were sitting an old lady and gentleman and a fat spaniel, all fast asleep.
You can imagine what a scene there was. The dog barked, the old lady and gentleman were furious.
“Stop, stop,” they cried to the chauffeur, who was driving on quite calmly and taking no notice at all of the noise going on behind him.
As for the farmer’s wife, she was so astonished that she could not say anything at all.
“What next?” stormed the old gentleman, foaming with rage. “What next, I should like to know? How dare you get into our car? How dare you, madam? What are we coming to? A pretty state of affairs when a man can’t go for a ride in his own car without being molested by impertinent strangers! Scandalous, scandalous! I shall report it to the police.”
The farmer’s wife had by this time managed to get out of the car, but she was so bewildered that she was still unable to speak, and long after the angry gentleman had driven off with his wife and his dog, she stood silent and motionless in the middle of the road with the umbrella in her hand, wide open, and with her mouth wide open too. Her daughter, who came hurrying up, was also very much astonished.
“What on earth made you do that, mother?” she said. “I couldn’t believe my own eyes.”
But her mother could only shake her head. She couldn’t make it out at all. Never, never had such an extraordinary thing befallen her.
“I am afraid I can’t be very well,” she said at last. “I think I’ll go and see the doctor to-morrow.” So the next day she went to see the doctor. It was rather showery and she took the umbrella again, for she had never thought of connecting it with the strange things which had occurred. The doctor felt her pulse and looked at her tongue.
“You’ve got a touch of Thingumabobitis,” he said. “You must be very careful. I’ll write you a few prescriptions. You must take a pill every three hours, and a pink powder every two hours, and a blue powder half an hour before every meal, and you must never on any account let your nose get cold. It’s not dangerous so long as you are careful. Come again next week.”
By this time the sun had come out, and as she was much taken up with wondering how she was going to keep her nose warm, the farmer’s wife forgot all about the umbrella. Next day, when she went to fetch it, it was gone. I don’t know what happened to it, nor who has it now. But let me give you a word of warning. If you come across a stray umbrella, pray be careful not to do any counting while you have it open in your hand. It wouldn’t be very pleasant to find yourself suddenly hanging from the top of the nearest church steeple, now would it?
Story DNA
Moral
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Plot Summary
A careless wizard leaves his magic umbrella, which is found by a farmer's wife. Unaware of its powers, she accidentally uses it to teleport home by counting to three and later into a moving car by counting to five, causing her great bewilderment. Unable to connect the umbrella to these strange occurrences, she attributes her experiences to illness and seeks a doctor. The umbrella eventually disappears, leaving the reader with a cautionary tale about stray magical objects.
Themes
Emotional Arc
curiosity to bewilderment to mild panic
Writing Style
Narrative Elements
Cultural Context
The mention of motor-cars suggests a setting around the early 20th century, a period of transition from purely rural life to increasing modernization, but still retaining a classic fairy tale feel.
Plot Beats (14)
- A wizard leaves his magic umbrella at a market stall.
- A farmer's wife finds the umbrella and takes it home, as no one claims it.
- The narrator explains the umbrella's magic: count three for home, five for desire, seven for a church spire.
- On a wet market day, the farmer's wife uses the umbrella for shelter.
- While selling eggs, she counts 'one, two, three' and is instantly transported to her kitchen.
- Confused, she invents an excuse for her early return to her husband, who is skeptical.
- Some time later, she takes the umbrella to shade herself while visiting her daughter.
- While resting with her daughter, she counts 'one, two, three, four, five' and wishes she was in a passing car.
- She is instantly transported into a car with an angry old couple and a barking dog.
- The old gentleman is furious, and the farmer's wife is too bewildered to speak.
- Her daughter is astonished, and the farmer's wife decides she must be ill.
- She visits a doctor, who gives her a nonsensical diagnosis and prescriptions.
- Distracted by the doctor's advice, she forgets the umbrella, and it disappears.
- The narrator concludes with a warning to the reader about finding stray umbrellas.
Characters
The Farmer's Wife ★ protagonist
A sturdy, practical woman of average height and build, accustomed to farm life. Her hands are likely calloused from work, and her face shows the lines of outdoor living.
Attire: A practical, sturdy dress made of wool or linen in muted colors like brown, grey, or dark blue, typical of a 19th or early 20th-century English countrywoman. She wears a clean apron over her dress and a simple bonnet to cover her hair.
Wants: To fulfill her daily duties, sell her goods, visit her daughter, and generally live a normal, uneventful life.
Flaw: Her naivete and lack of understanding of magic, leading her into bizarre situations. Her tendency to count aloud without thinking.
She experiences increasingly bizarre magical occurrences, leading her from mild confusion to utter bewilderment and a visit to the doctor, though she never fully comprehends the source of her troubles.
Practical, hardworking, a bit naive, easily surprised, secretive (initially), and prone to making excuses.
Image Prompt & Upload
A sturdy adult woman of average height and build, facing forward, full body visible from head to toe. She has a round, weathered face with a bewildered expression, brown hair neatly tucked under a simple grey bonnet. She wears a practical, dark blue linen dress, a clean white apron tied at the waist, and sturdy brown leather boots. Her hands are slightly calloused. She holds a wide-open black umbrella in her right hand and a wicker basket on her left arm. Her mouth is slightly agape in shock. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Wizard ○ minor
Not explicitly described, but implied to be a somewhat absent-minded individual, likely with a traditional wizardly appearance.
Attire: Traditional wizard robes, perhaps dark and flowing, though not explicitly stated.
Wants: To meet a friend, and presumably to practice magic.
Flaw: His forgetfulness, which leads to the loss of his powerful magical item.
Does not appear beyond the initial setup; his carelessness sets the plot in motion.
Careless, forgetful, powerful (possessing magic).
Image Prompt & Upload
An elderly male wizard, facing forward, full body visible from head to toe. He has a long white beard, a kind but slightly absent-minded expression, and wears a tall, dark blue pointed hat adorned with silver stars. He is dressed in flowing, dark purple velvet robes with wide sleeves, cinched at the waist with a braided silver cord. He holds a gnarled wooden staff in his left hand. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Farmer ○ minor
A robust, hearty man, typical of a farmer, likely with a strong build and weathered features from working outdoors.
Attire: Practical, sturdy work clothes: a simple shirt, trousers, and perhaps a waistcoat or jacket, made of durable fabrics like tweed or homespun wool, in earthy tones.
Wants: To work his farm and have his tea.
Flaw: His inability to believe in anything beyond the mundane, making him oblivious to the magic affecting his wife.
Remains unchanged, serving as a foil to his wife's magical experiences.
Skeptical, jovial (guffaws), practical, perhaps a bit dismissive of his wife's 'headaches'.
Image Prompt & Upload
A robust adult male farmer, facing forward, full body visible from head to toe. He has a broad, ruddy face with a skeptical but kind expression, short brown hair. He wears a simple cream linen shirt, sturdy brown tweed trousers, and a dark green wool waistcoat. He has strong, calloused hands. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Daughter ○ minor
Likely shares some features with her mother but is younger and perhaps a bit more refined, having married and moved to a nearby village.
Attire: A simple but neat dress, perhaps of cotton or a lighter wool, in a modest color, suitable for visiting or a walk, reflecting a slightly less arduous life than her mother's.
Wants: To visit with her mother and enjoy a walk.
Flaw: Her inability to understand her mother's strange behavior.
Witnesses her mother's second magical incident, becoming very astonished but offering no solution.
Concerned, astonished, questioning.
Image Prompt & Upload
A young adult woman of average height and slender build, facing forward, full body visible from head to toe. She has a pleasant, round face with wide, astonished eyes and light brown hair pulled back neatly. She wears a modest, light blue cotton dress with a simple white collar and dark brown leather shoes. Her hands are clasped in front of her in surprise. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Old Gentleman ○ minor
A portly, well-dressed elderly man, likely with a red face from anger.
Attire: Formal, expensive attire typical of an early 20th-century gentleman: a dark suit, perhaps a waistcoat, a crisp shirt, and a tie. Possibly a bowler hat or similar headwear.
Wants: To enjoy a peaceful ride in his car.
Flaw: His short temper and pride.
Remains a caricature of an angry, entitled upper-class man.
Furious, pompous, easily enraged, entitled, indignant.
Image Prompt & Upload
A portly elderly man, facing forward, full body visible from head to toe. He has a round, red face contorted in fury, a neatly trimmed white mustache, and thin white hair. He wears a dark grey wool suit, a crisp white shirt, a striped silk tie, and a dark waistcoat. His hands are clenched into fists. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Old Lady ○ minor
A well-dressed elderly woman, likely plump and proper.
Attire: Elegant, formal attire suitable for an early 20th-century lady of means: a tailored dress or suit, perhaps with a fur stole or decorative hat, made of fine wool or silk.
Wants: To enjoy a peaceful ride in her car.
Flaw: Her delicate sensibilities, easily shocked by impropriety.
Remains a caricature of an angry, upper-class woman.
Furious, proper, easily upset.
Image Prompt & Upload
A plump elderly woman, facing forward, full body visible from head to toe. She has a refined face with wide, furious eyes, and white hair styled neatly under a decorative hat adorned with a feather. She wears an elegant, tailored dark green wool suit with a high collar and a pearl necklace. Her hands are clasped tightly in front of her. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Fat Spaniel ○ minor
A plump, well-fed spaniel, likely with long, floppy ears and a soft, curly coat.
Attire: None, but perhaps a fancy collar.
Wants: To sleep peacefully and then to bark at intruders.
Flaw: Its sleepiness, making it vulnerable to surprise.
Serves as a reaction to the Farmer's Wife's sudden appearance.
Sleepy, easily startled, protective (of its owners).
Image Prompt & Upload
A plump, adult spaniel dog, facing forward, full body visible head to toe. It has long, floppy brown and white ears, soft curly fur, and a startled expression with its mouth open in a bark. Its tail is slightly raised. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Doctor ○ minor
A professional-looking man, likely clean-shaven and well-groomed, with a reassuring but slightly eccentric demeanor.
Attire: Formal, professional attire of the era: a dark suit, white shirt, and tie. Perhaps a white lab coat over his clothes, though not explicitly stated.
Wants: To diagnose and treat his patients.
Flaw: His diagnosis is clearly a made-up one, indicating he doesn't understand the true cause of the Farmer's Wife's ailments.
Provides a humorous, non-magical explanation for the Farmer's Wife's magical experiences.
Professional, slightly whimsical (making up 'Thingumabobitis'), reassuring, observant (noticing the weather).
Image Prompt & Upload
A middle-aged male doctor, facing forward, full body visible head to toe. He has a clean-shaven, kind face with a slightly bemused expression, and neatly combed dark brown hair. He wears a crisp white medical coat over a dark grey suit, a white shirt, and a dark blue tie. He holds a small prescription pad and a pen in his right hand. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
Locations
Country Town Market-place
A bustling market square in a small country town, featuring numerous wooden market stalls. The ground is likely cobblestone or packed earth, and the air would carry the sounds and smells of a busy market day. On a wet day, canvas roofs of the stalls would drip rain.
Mood: Lively, busy, later a bit damp and ordinary.
The magic umbrella is found by the farmer's wife. She later uses it here for the first time, accidentally transporting herself home.
Image Prompt & Upload
A bustling market square in a small English country town, circa early 20th century. Wooden market stalls with canvas awnings line a cobblestone square, some dripping with recent rain. Farmers and townspeople in period attire mill about, selling produce. The sky is overcast but brightening, with soft, diffused light. Depth is created by rows of stalls receding into the background. no border, no frame, no watermark, no text, no signature, edge-to-edge illustration.
Farmer's Kitchen
A pleasant, functional kitchen in a farmer's house. It would be a warm, lived-in space, likely with a large hearth, a sturdy wooden table, and simple, practical furnishings typical of an early 20th-century English farmhouse.
Mood: Cozy, domestic, familiar, later a place of bewilderment.
The farmer's wife is magically transported here from the market. She later keeps the umbrella unused in a corner.
Image Prompt & Upload
A warm, inviting kitchen inside an early 20th-century English farmhouse. A sturdy, scrubbed wooden table dominates the center, surrounded by simple wooden chairs. A large stone hearth with a simmering pot is visible on one wall. Sunlight streams through a small window, illuminating dust motes in the air. Practical kitchen utensils hang from hooks, and a patterned rug lies on the flagstone floor. no border, no frame, no watermark, no text, no signature, edge-to-edge illustration.
Neighboring Common/Heath
An open expanse of common land or heath, a few miles from the farmer's village. It features dry, grassy patches by the side of a road, with sparse, hardy vegetation typical of an English heathland. The road is busy with motor-cars.
Mood: Open, exposed, initially relaxing, then chaotic.
The farmer's wife and her daughter rest here. The farmer's wife accidentally transports herself into a passing motor-car.
Image Prompt & Upload
A wide, sun-drenched English heathland in the height of summer. Patches of dry, golden grass and clumps of purple heather stretch towards a distant horizon. A dusty, unpaved road cuts through the landscape, with a few early 20th-century motor-cars visible in the distance. The sky is a clear, brilliant blue with a few wispy clouds. The air shimmers with heat. no border, no frame, no watermark, no text, no signature, edge-to-edge illustration.