CASING ADDER BET
by Howard L. Chace · from Anguish Languish
Adapted Version
Mudville had a good baseball player. His name was Casey. Casey was a strong player. He played for Mudville. He was the best player. Everyone liked Casey very much.
Casey loved Annie. Annie loved Casey too. They wanted to marry. They dreamed of a home. But Casey had no money. So they could not marry.
One day, there was a big game. Mudville needed to win. The team was not playing well. Casey came to bat now. He was their last hope.
The crowd saw Casey. They were very happy. They cheered very loudly. Annie was there. She was happy too. They knew Casey would win.
Casey waved to the crowd. He waved to Annie. He stood at the plate. He held his bat. He got ready.
The pitcher threw the ball. It went very fast. The ball went past him. Casey did not swing. The Umpire said, "Strike one!"
The crowd was not happy. Their cheers stopped. They shouted loudly now. Annie was very sad. She started to cry.
The pitcher threw again. He tried very hard. Casey swung his bat. He missed the ball. The Umpire said, "Strike two!"
The crowd was very upset. They shouted very much. Hope was fading. Annie cried more. She was very sad.
Casey looked serious. He held his bat tight. He must hit it. He got ready for the ball. This was the last pitch.
Casey swung very hard. He wanted to hit it. But he missed the ball! There was no sound. The Umpire said, "Strike three!" He said, "You are out!"
The crowd was very quiet. No one spoke. They were very sad. Annie cried a lot. She was very, very sad.
Everyone was sad. Mudville lost the game. It was a sad day.
Casey was famous now. He missed the ball. People came to Mudville. They wanted to see the man. The man who missed. They wanted to see Casey.
Casey did fun tricks. He juggled balls. He told jokes. He made people laugh. He earned much money. He became rich.
Casey had money now. He married Annie. They lived in a nice home. They smiled every day. They were very happy. So, Casey and Annie were very happy. Casey learned a lesson. Even when you miss, good things can happen.
Original Story
CASING ADDER BET
Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright;
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light,
And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout;
But there is no joy in Mudville—mighty Casey has struck out.
Ernest Lawrence Thayer
Heresy borsch-boil starry a boarder borsch boil gam plate lung, lung a gore inner ladle wan hearse torn coiled Mutt-fill.
Mutt-fill worsen mush offer torn, butted hatter putty gut borsch-boil tame, an off oiler pliers honor tame, door moist cerebrated worse Casing. Casing worsted sickened basement, any hatter betting orphanage off .526 (punt fife toe sex).
Casing worse gut lurking, an furry poplar—spatially wetter gull coiled Any-bally. Any-bally worse Casing’s sweat-hard, any harpy cobble wandered toe gat merit, bought Casing worse toe pore toe becalm Any-bally’s horsebarn, (Boil pliers honor Mutt-fill tame dint gat mush offer celery; infect, day gut nosing atoll.)
Bought less gat earn wetter starry.
Wan dare, inner Mutt-fill borsch boil pork, door scar stud lack disk inner lest in-ink:
Water disgorging saturation! Oiler Mutt-fill rotors setting inner grin-stance, war failing furry darn inner mouse.
Bought, watcher thank hopping? Soddenly wan offer Mutt-fill pliers hitter shingle, an an-udder plier gutter gnats toe beggar! Soda war ptomaine earn basis. Bust off oil, Casing ham-shelf, Mutt-fill’s cerebrated better, worse combing ope toe bet!
Whinny kraut inner grin-stance sore Casing combing, day stuttered toe clabber hens an yowl, “Dare’s CASING! Attar bore, Casing!” An whinny hansom sickened basement sundered confidentially ope tutor plat, oiler Mutt-fill rotors shorted:
“CASING ROAR!
CASING ROAR!
ROAR, ROAR, CASING!”
Putty ladle Any-bally, setting oil buyer shelf inner grin-stance, worse furry prod offer gut lurking loafer. Lack oiler udder pimple, Any-bally worse shore debt Casing worse garner winner boil gam fur Mutt-fill.
Casing weaved tutor kraut, an castor sweat glands add Any-bally, den retched darn tutor grunt an robbed dart honors hens, an warped haze hens honors pence.
“PLY BOIL!” shorted door empire, gadding impassioned.
Casing pecked upper bet, an locked adder patcher, any set tomb shelf:
“Latter comb! Arm garner smirk disk boil rat offer defense!”
ZOMBIE! Door boil short pest Casing lacquer canning boil. Casing dint peony tension turret.
“STORK WARN!” crater empire.
Door kraut inner grin-stance stuttered shorting an coursing.
“Wart inhale’s madder wet debt empire’s ICE? Hazy gun BLAND?”
“Lessen, empire—Java heifer ICE exempted? Batter goiter seeder obstetrician!”
“Boor! Boor! B-o-o-r!”
“O water bag BOMB!”
Door patcher warn dope akin, any boil short pest Casing lacquer bullock firmer raffle.
“STORK TOE!” setter empire, lurking unctuously adder kraut.
Oiler Mutt-fill fens an rotors war hurling wet anchor! Servile bear bordels an corker cooler bordels cam firmer grin-stance, an fail honor grunt, nut for firmer pore empire’s fate.
Inner grin-stance, ladle Any-bally, hoe dint lacquer seer loafer mucker bag foal otter ham-shelf, bay-gander wiper ice wetter tawny ladle lazy hanker-sniff.
Wants akin, Casing locked adder patcher, disk term wetter lock off gram razor-lotion honors phase.
“Jest locket Casing!” whiskered door kraut, “Disk term, Casing manes baseness. Badger Casing’s garner smirk debt borsch-boil rat offer defense!”
SWASH! Casing swank adder boil wet oilers farce! Water swank! Wart anomalous farce! Wart gram razor-lotion!
Water sham debt Casing dint hitter boil!
“Stork tree—yore art!” whiskered door empire, trampling, an gadding ratty toe dock corker cooler bordels an bear bordels.
Door kraut worse stunt.
Any-bally worse sopping historically inner tawny ladle lazy hanker-sniff.
Wail, yawl nor debt putty pacer pottery coiled CASING ADDER BET—spatially doze lest melon-colic versus:
“O psalm-war an disk fevered lend, door soreness shunning brat;
Door benders plying psalm-war, an psalm-war hurts alite,
An psalm-war manor luffing, an psalm-war chaldron short;
Butter ash nor jarring Mutt-fill—muddy Casing hash stork art!”
Bought lessen, forks! Wander nor wart rally hopping? Wail, doze putty versus becalm cerebrated—an Casing becalm cerebrated, toe! Suture bag kraut off pimple cam toe Mutt-fill toe shag hens wetter hansom borsch boil plier debt Casing win enter parlor-tricks, an gat retch. An, whinny gut retch (conjure gas?) Casing becalm door diverted horsebarn off putty ladle Any-bally.
Story DNA
Plot Summary
Casey, Mudville's celebrated but poor baseball player, is in love with Annie-ball but cannot marry her. In a crucial game, with the crowd's hopes on him, Casey strikes out, leading to widespread disappointment. However, his famous failure unexpectedly brings him celebrity, allowing him to earn wealth through parlor tricks. Ultimately, Casey marries Annie-ball, transforming his initial defeat into a happy and prosperous life.
Themes
Emotional Arc
disappointment to triumph
Writing Style
Narrative Elements
Cultural Context
This story is a humorous reinterpretation of the famous American poem 'Casey at the Bat,' using phonetic spelling to create a comedic effect. The original poem ends in tragedy for Mudville; this version provides a 'happily ever after' for Casey.
Plot Beats (16)
- The story introduces Mudville and its famous baseball player, Casey, who has a high batting average.
- Casey is in love with Annie-ball but cannot marry her due to his poverty as a baseball player.
- During a critical baseball game, with the Mudville team struggling, Casey comes up to bat.
- The crowd, including Annie-ball, cheers wildly for Casey, confident he will win the game.
- Casey acknowledges the crowd and Annie-ball, then prepares to bat.
- The pitcher throws a fast pitch, and Casey lets it pass, resulting in 'Stork Warn!' (Strike One).
- The crowd becomes angry and boos the umpire, while Annie-ball begins to cry.
- The pitcher throws another fast pitch, and Casey misses again, resulting in 'Stork Toe!' (Strike Two).
- The crowd's anger escalates, throwing bottles and coolers, and Annie-ball cries harder.
- Casey, with a look of grim resolution, prepares for the third pitch.
- Casey swings with all his strength, but misses the ball, resulting in 'Stork tree—yore art!' (Strike Three—you're out!).
- The crowd is stunned, and Annie-ball is sobbing hysterically.
- The story references the famous melancholic verses about Casey striking out.
- The narrator reveals the 'true' ending: Casey's strikeout made him so famous that people came to Mudville to see him.
- Casey capitalized on his fame by performing parlor tricks and became rich.
- Casey eventually married Annie-ball, fulfilling their dream.
Characters
Casing ★ protagonist
A well-built, athletic man, likely tall and strong, befitting a celebrated baseball player. His physique would suggest power and agility, though the story doesn't specify height or build beyond 'gut lurking'.
Attire: A traditional baseball uniform of the late 19th century, likely made of wool flannel in white or light grey, with dark piping or trim. It would include knickerbockers, a button-down jersey, a cap, and high socks. He would also wear a leather baseball glove.
Wants: To be the best baseball player, to win games for Mudville, to gain wealth, and to marry Any-bally.
Flaw: Overconfidence and perhaps a moment of underestimation of his opponent, leading to his strikeout.
He experiences a humiliating public failure by striking out, but then leverages his fame from the poem about his failure into a successful career in 'parlor-tricks', becoming rich and marrying Any-bally.
Confident, popular, determined, somewhat arrogant (believing he can 'smirk disk boil rat offer defense'), and ultimately resilient (recovering from his strikeout to become rich and marry).
Image Prompt & Upload
A tall, muscular young adult male, with a confident expression, standing at home plate in a late 19th-century baseball uniform. He wears a white wool flannel jersey with dark blue piping, matching knickerbockers, high dark blue socks, and brown leather cleats. A dark blue baseball cap is on his head, and he holds a wooden baseball bat over his shoulder, looking determined. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
Any-bally ◆ supporting
A 'putty ladle' (pretty little) woman, suggesting a delicate and perhaps petite build. Her appearance is described as 'gut lurking' (good looking).
Attire: Modest but attractive attire suitable for a young woman attending a baseball game in the late 19th century. This might include a long skirt, a fitted blouse with puffed sleeves, and perhaps a small hat or bonnet. The story mentions her wiping her eyes with a 'tawny ladle lazy hanker-sniff' (tiny little lacy handkerchief), implying a certain refinement.
Wants: To marry Casing and be his wife, to see him succeed.
Flaw: Her emotional vulnerability, especially concerning Casing's failures.
She begins as Casing's loving but unwed sweetheart, distressed by his failure. She ends up marrying Casing after he becomes rich, fulfilling her desire.
Loving, supportive, emotional, loyal, and proud of Casing.
Image Prompt & Upload
A petite young adult female with a pretty, delicate face, fair skin, and soft features. Her eyes are slightly red from crying, and she holds a small, white lace-trimmed handkerchief to her face. She wears a late 19th-century dress with a long, dark blue skirt and a cream-colored blouse with subtle lace detailing at the collar and cuffs. Her hair is styled neatly in a modest updo. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
The Empire ○ minor
The story doesn't give specific physical details, but as an umpire, he would likely be a man of authority, perhaps with a stern or unctuous demeanor.
Attire: A formal umpire's uniform of the late 19th century, which would typically be a dark suit (perhaps black or dark blue), a white shirt, and a tie. He might wear a dark cap or hat.
Wants: To officiate the baseball game fairly, despite crowd pressure.
Flaw: Fear of the angry crowd, which causes him to tremble and prepare to dodge projectiles.
He remains consistent in his role, facing the wrath of the crowd but ultimately making the correct calls.
Authoritative, somewhat unctuous, and easily intimidated by an angry crowd.
Image Prompt & Upload
An adult male umpire, standing with a stern expression, wearing a dark blue wool suit, a white collared shirt, and a dark tie. He has a dark blue umpire's cap on his head. His posture is rigid, and he holds his hands up, signaling a strikeout, while his eyes dart nervously, anticipating objects thrown from an unseen crowd. Plain white background, full body visible head to toe, single figure, no watermark, no text, no signature.
Locations
Mudville Ballpark
A local baseball park in the town of Mudville, featuring a grandstand filled with spectators ('rotors setting inner grin-stance'). The field itself is where the game is played, with a home plate ('plat') and a pitcher's mound. The atmosphere is initially tense and then erupts into anger and despair.
Mood: Tense, hopeful, then angry, despairing, and ultimately stunned.
The climax of the baseball game where Casey strikes out, leading to Mudville's defeat and the crowd's devastation.
Image Prompt & Upload
A vintage American baseball park grandstand, packed with a diverse crowd of spectators in early 20th-century attire, their faces a mix of shock and anger. The wooden grandstand is weathered, with peeling paint and visible timber supports. Beyond the stands, the green outfield stretches towards a distant, hazy tree line under a bright, clear afternoon sky. The dirt of the infield is visible, leading to a home plate where a lone umpire stands, looking nervous. no border, no frame, no watermark, no text, no signature, edge-to-edge illustration.
