LADLE RAT ROTTEN HUT
by Howard L. Chace
Little Red Riding Hood
A girl lived near a forest. She wore a red hood. People called her Little Red Riding Hood. She lived with her Mother. Their house was by the forest.
Mother spoke to Little Red Riding Hood. "Take this food to Grandmother," she said. "Grandmother is sick in bed. Do not stop in the forest. Do not talk to strangers. Go straight to her house."
Little Red Riding Hood said, "Okay." She took the basket. She started her walk. She went into the forest.
On her way, a Big Bad Wolf came. He looked at her. He had a cunning smile. "Hello, little girl," he said. "Where are you going today?"
Little Red Riding Hood answered him. "I go to Grandmother's house," she said. "She is sick. I bring her food. It is bread and cookies."
The wolf had a bad idea. He wanted to get there first. "I will take a short path," he thought. He ran fast to the house.
The wolf came to Grandmother's house. He knocked on the door. Grandmother opened it. The wolf tricked her. He tied her up. He put her in a closet. Then he put on her clothes. He got into her bed.
Soon, Little Red Riding Hood came. She knocked on the door. She waited for Grandmother.
The wolf spoke in a weak voice. "Come in, dear," he said. Little Red Riding Hood opened the door.
Little Red Riding Hood went to the bed. She looked at "Grandmother." "What big eyes!" she said. "Oh, Grandmother, what a big nose!" she said. "Oh, Grandmother, what a big mouth!"
The wolf answered in a weak voice. "To see, smell, and eat you better!"
The wolf jumped from the bed. He tried to grab her. A woodcutter came inside. He scared the wolf away. The woodcutter freed Grandmother. Little Red Riding Hood was safe. Listen to your mother and beware strangers.
Original Story
LADLE RAT ROTTEN HUT
Wants pawn term dare worsted ladle gull hoe lift wetter murder inner ladle cordage honor itch offer lodge, dock, florist. Disk ladle gull orphan worry putty ladle rat cluck wetter ladle rat hut, an fur disk raisin pimple colder Ladle Rat Rotten Hut.
Wan moaning Ladle Rat Rotten Hut’s murder colder inset.
“Ladle Rat Rotten Hut, heresy ladle basking winsome burden barter an shirker cockles. Tick disk ladle basking tutor cordage offer groin-murder hoe lifts honor udder site offer florist. Shaker lake! Dun stopper laundry wrote! Dun stopper peck floors! Dun daily-doily inner florist, an yonder nor sorghum-stenches, dun stopper torque wet strainers!”
“Hoe-cake, murder,” resplendent Ladle Rat Rotten Hut, an tickle ladle basking an stuttered oft.
Honor wrote tutor cordage offer groin-murder, Ladle Rat Rotten Hut mitten anomalous woof.
“Wail, wail, wail!” set disk wicket woof, “Evanescent Ladle Rat Rotten Hut! Wares are putty ladle gull goring wizard ladle basking?”
“Armor goring tumor groin-murder’s,” reprisal ladle gull. “Grammar’s seeking bet. Armor ticking arson burden barter an shirker cockles.”
“O hoe! Heifer gnats woke,” setter wicket woof, butter taught tomb shelf, “Oil tickle shirt court tutor cordage offer groin-murder. Oil ketchup wetter letter, an den—O bore!”
Soda wicket woof tucker shirt court, an whinny retched a cordage offer groin-murder, picked inner windrow, an sore debtor pore oil worming worse lion inner bet. Inner flesh, disk abdominal woof lipped honor bet, paunched honor pore oil worming, an garbled erupt. Den disk ratchet ammonol pot honor groin-murder’s nut cup an gnat-gun, any curdled ope inner bet.
Inner ladle wile, Ladle Rat Rotten Hut a raft attar cordage, an ranker dough ball. “Comb ink, sweat hard,” setter wicket woof, disgracing is verse.
Ladle Rat Rotten Hut entity bet rum, an stud buyer groin-murder’s bet.
“O Grammar!” crater ladle gull historically, “Water bag icer gut! A nervous sausage bag ice!”
“Battered lucky chew whiff, sweat hard,” setter bloat-Thursday woof, wetter wicket small honors phase.
“O, Grammar, water bag noise! A nervous sore suture anomalous prognosis!”
“Battered small your whiff, doling,” whiskered dole woof, ants mouse worse waddling.
“O Grammar, water bag mouser gut! A nervous sore suture bag mouse!”
Daze worry on-forger-nut ladle gull’s lest warts. Oil offer sodden, caking offer carvers an sprinkling otter bet, disk hoard-hoarded woof lipped own pore Ladle Rat Rotten Hut an garbled erupt.
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MURAL: Yonder nor sorghum stenches shut ladle gulls stopper torque wet strainers.
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Moral of the Story
Yonder nor sorghum stenches shut ladle gulls stopper torque wet strainers.
Characters
Ladle Rat Rotten Hut ★ protagonist
A small, delicate girl of average height for her age, with a slight build. Her skin is fair and unblemished, with a youthful complexion.
Attire: She wears a 'putty ladle rat cluck' (pretty little red cloak), which is her most distinctive item. This would be a simple, hooded cloak made of practical wool or linen, dyed a vibrant red, fastened at the neck. Underneath, she would wear a modest, light-colored linen dress, possibly with a simple apron, typical of a European peasant child of an unspecified historical period.
Wants: To deliver a basket of food to her sick grandmother and follow her mother's instructions.
Flaw: Her extreme naivety and trusting nature, which makes her vulnerable to strangers and easily deceived.
She begins as an obedient and trusting child but ultimately falls victim to her own naivety and the wolf's deception, failing to learn the lesson about strangers.
Naive, obedient (initially), trusting, curious, and easily distracted.
Murder ◆ supporting
A woman of average height and build, likely showing the signs of a life of labor in a rural setting, but still capable and authoritative.
Attire: She would wear practical, sturdy peasant clothing, such as a long, dark linen or wool skirt, a simple blouse, and a plain apron, typical of a European mother living near a forest.
Wants: To ensure her sick mother receives nourishment and to protect her daughter from danger.
Flaw: Her inability to physically protect her daughter once she leaves the cottage.
Remains a static character, serving as the initial source of instruction and warning.
Authoritative, cautious, responsible, and loving (implied by sending food to her mother).
Anomalous Woof ⚔ antagonist
A large, powerful wolf, much bigger and more menacing than a typical forest wolf. Its fur would be dark, perhaps a mottled grey or black, with a lean, muscular build. Its eyes would be piercing and cunning.
Attire: None, as it is an animal, but it does don the 'Groin-murder’s nut cup an gnat-gun' (nightcap and nightgown) to impersonate her.
Wants: To trick and consume both the grandmother and Ladle Rat Rotten Hut for food.
Flaw: Overconfidence and perhaps a lack of true disguise, relying on the victim's naivety.
Remains a static character, embodying pure evil and cunning throughout the story.
Wicked, cunning, deceptive, gluttonous, and cruel.
Groin-murder ○ minor
An old, frail woman, likely thin and weak from illness, confined to her bed. Her skin would be wrinkled and pale.
Attire: Simple, worn nightclothes, such as a white linen nightgown and a nightcap, suitable for an elderly, sick woman in a rural cottage.
Wants: To recover from her illness.
Flaw: Her physical frailty and illness, making her an easy target.
A static character who is a victim of the wolf.
Weak, vulnerable, and trusting (implied by her being easily deceived and consumed).
Locations
Ladle Rat Rotten Hut's Cordage
A small, humble cottage, likely a Fachwerk house with a thatched roof, nestled on the edge of a large, dark forest. It would have a simple, rustic interior.
Mood: Cozy, domestic, but with an underlying sense of caution due to the proximity to the 'dock, florist' (dark forest).
Ladle Rat Rotten Hut receives instructions from her mother to take a basket to her sick grandmother.
The Lodge, Dock, Florist (Large, Dark Forest)
A vast, dense, and dark forest, implying a sense of mystery and potential danger. It has a 'wrote' (road/path) winding through it. The trees are likely tall and close-set, limiting sunlight.
Mood: Eerie, foreboding, mysterious, isolated.
Ladle Rat Rotten Hut encounters the 'anomalous woof' (wicked wolf) here, and the wolf takes a 'shirt court' (short cut) to the grandmother's cottage.
Groin-Murder's Cordage (Grandmother's Cottage)
Another small cottage, similar in style to Ladle Rat Rotten Hut's, but perhaps more isolated, 'honor udder site offer florist' (on the other side of the forest). It contains a bed where the sick grandmother (and later the wolf) lies.
Mood: Initially appears safe and familiar, but quickly becomes tense and terrifying due to the wolf's presence.
The wolf devours the grandmother and then Ladle Rat Rotten Hut in this cottage, marking the climax of the story.
Story DNA
Moral
Yonder nor sorghum stenches shut ladle gulls stopper torque wet strainers.
Plot Summary
Ladle Rat Rotten Hut is sent by her mother to deliver food to her sick grandmother, with strict instructions not to talk to strangers. On her journey through the forest, she encounters a 'wicked woof' who learns of her destination. The wolf takes a shortcut, devours the grandmother, and then disguises himself in her bed. When Ladle Rat Rotten Hut arrives, she notices her 'grandmother's' unusually large features, only to be eaten by the wolf in a sudden attack.
Themes
Emotional Arc
innocence to peril
Writing Style
Narrative Elements
Cultural Context
This story is a linguistic experiment and parody, not a traditional folk tale. It was created by Howard L. Chace to demonstrate the phonetic nature of English and is often used in linguistics or language arts contexts.
Plot Beats (12)
- A girl named Ladle Rat Rotten Hut, known for her red hood, lives with her mother near a forest.
- Her mother asks her to take a basket of food to her sick grandmother, warning her not to stop or talk to strangers.
- Ladle Rat Rotten Hut agrees and sets off.
- On the way, she encounters a 'wicked woof' who asks where she is going.
- She tells the wolf she is visiting her sick grandmother to bring her food.
- The wolf decides to take a shortcut to the grandmother's house to get there first.
- The wolf arrives, enters the house, eats the grandmother, and then puts on her nightcap and gets into her bed.
- Ladle Rat Rotten Hut arrives shortly after and knocks.
- The wolf, disguised as the grandmother, tells her to come in.
- Ladle Rat Rotten Hut enters and stands by the bed, remarking on her 'grandmother's' large eyes, nose, and mouth.
- The wolf responds to each observation with a disguised voice.
- After Ladle Rat Rotten Hut comments on the large mouth, the wolf throws off the covers and eats her too.
